In the beginning there was your immediate environment, your body and a basic ability to communicate the general gist. No writing, no tools, no real understanding as we now understand it. You were an ape, a smelly screechy ape! You followed instincts and struggled to comprehend what your mother would do just before she ate. It became vaguely clear that in order to survive you need to stay in with the group.

You would develop behavioral patterns with the group in which you had been born. As you develop, you become increasingly aware that the group is absolutely vital to your own survival, an instinctual aim. You need to mate.

Over the years members of that group move off, following instinctual drives to mate with members of other groups, or perhaps they are simply pushed out by a member of your group who’s instinctual motive to survive is particularly strong. Many will have simply died.

These dynamics are over in the blink of an eye and before you know it you have lost all but head hair, pubic hair and a few other scatterings. Survival this far is not possible without reproduction and passing on your unique essence in genes, which may go into the future far beyond the lifetime of any creature.

Your genes may now be carried by a Hominid. You are a Hominid species, still an ape nonetheless, and group living is still the aim of the survival game. Your brain is larger and survival begins with a thought process more so than before. Inanimate objects have become potential resources that can be used alongside other objects to gain a reward. Communication among the group has been a little refined as thought has become more sophisticated.

Fear is the dominant emotion, a little understanding brings with it a sort of comprehension of death and suffering. Both of these are every day very real likely hoods and appear random. You are prey for many larger animals and huge numbers of those born die for unknown reason at any life stage.

Your group makes gestures and sounds when a member dies, this becomes new a behavioral pattern. They also express similar behavior when a kill is made, or the sun rises. Elation and depression.

The Hominid modal was a success! Newer versions survived and one is now producing this post. Hominid species have successfully molded their environment using advanced tools thought up by their minds, which are produced by their brains, which are stored in their heads, which are attached to their bodies.

What a clever ape!

Buzz Kill

Skeptical? Good! Stick around you filthy animal.

Tiddly wank!

Buzz Killington and Godfrey Killjoy (our REAL names).